Assume the identity

Stardate 58063.0 (6-30-2005)

Years ago, I worked for a company that developed games for
various personal computers and consoles, as well as arcade games. They
contracted with the major distributors like Atari and EA. Some of the
distributors wrote language into the contract that the payments to the developer
would be suspended if any extra functionality were added to a game such as
Easter Eggs. I was told several times by a Vice President of IT that I was to
remove the “Arming the photon torpedoes” message from the boot sequence of
one of the UNIX servers, because that was “unprofessional”. The guy was full
of himself for being technology savvy. However, it was all with MS-DOS. He had
no idea how I added the message, and I think it frustrated him. I noticed it was
still there a couple of years after I had moved out of the system administration
job. I still have a script that gets run on a daily basis that has a slightly
updated wording "Arming the quantum torpedoes".

The point of this is that I think developers still sneak
things in. I got a warning today from Visual Studio .NET after added a module to
a project:

 



Basically, I am replacing the old module with a newer one.
The wording that caught my eye was “assume the identity”. My first reaction
to it was "What, the credit card numbers and everything?" What if a
similar message was in Windows Explorer? "The file foo.txt already exists
in C:\TEMP. Clicking Yes will allow the new file
to assume the identity of foo.txt in C:\TEMP." That would have a few users
panic. Better yet, transfer the developer to the Office software division. Then
Mr. PaperClip can have options like

"You are about to save bar.doc. This already exists in
the same location. Do you want to?
Continue. The item will automatically assume the identity of the existing item.
Move the item to a new location. You will need to visit your local Post Office
to fill out the appropriate change of address forms.
Allow the new item to create several false identities.
Inform the proper authorities of the identity theft. A Witness Relocation form
will be filled out for you."

The beauty of these is that they are not mutually
exclusive. One or all can be selected.

Humor in the workplace is important, I think. Too many
people get wrapped up in the pressure, and crack. I use sci-fi phases in
response to common questions to help.

"I find your lack of faith disturbing." This is
in response to someone asking me if I will have something ready by a deadline,
usually because a exec is worried. I have an MP3 of it because the doing the
raspy breathing with the deep James Earl Jones voice is really hard. 

"You will be assimilated. Resistance is futile."
Standard response to a reorg and acquisition notice.

"H'jol! nadev valyinbe'" This is reserved for when I find something I did and I should know better. The fact that it is Klingon always gets someones attention. (The translation is: "Beam me up! There is no intelligent life here.")

"These are not the driods you are looking for."
Accompanied by a slight wave of a hand. When someone comes looking for someone else who is obviously not at their desk. 

"In-CON-ceivable!" For the blatantly obvious comment. 

"When 900 years old you reach, look this good, you will not." When someone realizes how long I have been with the company. 

"Humor. It is a difficult concept. It is not logical." For those worn out office jokes. 

Feel free to use them. A word of caution, you may be perceived
as not caring about your work. I've been there long enough that most people know this is not true.

End of Entry

Moab

Stardate 58062.7 (6-27-2005)

Moab was a nice break. It was not too hot, and we had a good time. I thought that it was funny that the dog was the one most anxious to get home. He kept heading to the car the day we got back to camp from Goblin Valley. It is fun to go camping with friends. Kevin started calling me Tennesee Tim after I bought a new hat. 

We tried out the KOA kabin as an experiment. It worked out. We are planning to drive to Indiana and Ohio to visit my brother and brother-in-law. The kabins are much cheaper than a hotel room, and we can sleep five a lot easier. Dayton, though, was a problem. Seems to be popular.

There were 168 emails at work when I got in Monday. A lot of questions, issues, and other stuff that seems like only I can solve. I was only gone the weekend.

MySQL crashed on my computer. I finally figured out why. For some reason, it does not like spaces in the path. So the default install to "Program Files" is bad. It did run for a few days, though, so it can't be as simple as that. I thought problems like that were long gone. I did get it back up and running. 

End of Entry

Bad Day

Stardate 58062.2 (6-22-2005)

Today was one of those days. I wake up about a quarter to eight, push Rachel out of bed to get to tennis. I can't find the car keys. After searching for 5 minutes, I do find them. I drop her off, and run back home to fix a web problem. The laptop won't boot. Fix that problem, fix the web problem, and can't find the car keys AGAIN. After an hour of searching, I call triple-A, and they send a locksmith. He can't do anything, the dealer needs to make a new key. He calls for a towtruck. The lawnmower repair guy shows up, and then the towtruck. The repair guy is in the way, the towtruck can't get to the car. The mail carrier can't get to our mailbox. The repair guy finishes, but the mower is on its last legs. The towtruck guys get the cable stuck under the tire dragging the car onto the bed of the truck. They leave tire marks on my driveway. I find the car keys after the towtruck leaves, of course. The car dealer tells me I can't use them, they have already reprogrammed the car. I thought I'd fix the day by doing some And to top it off, I didn't outscore Carl. I got 894 out of 1000.



Well, I was going to get another set of keys, and I am not surprised about the mower. It's years old, and we have beat it up. 

April's job is becoming like mine. Even when she has the day off, they are still calling all day. 

I have not gotten back to Rome: Total War yet. No time. I did think about some of my victories. A lot were with 40-50% losses. I'm not sure if that's normal, but I might check it out. I do know that was not the case with Alexander at Issus. (I can dream, can't I?) I did get the ability to build seige units. That will help. The Gauls are out of the game, which also helps. 

The week is almost over, just a little more...

End of Entry

Rome: Total War

Stardate 58062.0 (6-20-2005)

Kudos to Christopher Nolan and Christian Bale for an outstanding Batman Begins. They went a long way to make you care about the man in the costume, and why he dons it. This is even better than the Tim Burton feature. You don't get to see Batman until about an hour into it. Bale put the same voice change that Kevin Conroy did for the animated series. The movie ends with the promise of a sequel with the Joker. Rumor is that the Clown Prince of Crime might be played by Mark Hamill. It would not be a big leap for him since he did an excellent job as the voice of the same character in the animated series. I would recommend you see this.

I finally loaded Rome:Total War, and I am already addicted. You start out in 329 B.C. (or B.C.E., in the new nomenclature). Rome is just the city and the area that immediately surrounds it. You are one of the ruling families, and you expand your power by conquering cities and building resources. I defeated the Greek hoplites pretty easily, but the Gauls gave me trouble. There are also options to fight a historical battle, or just a random battle. 

The weekend went ok. I got the south fence painted. The kids (mine and two extras, plus the neighborhood kids, somewhere between 5 and 10 most of the time) were ok, but the boys could not seem to find anything to do except play video games. I don't mind that they do, but when they can't think of anything else to do, I get concerned.

End of Entry

Site updates

Stardate 58061.7 (6-17-2005)

I did a few much needed site updates yesterday. The link to the Star Trek actors page was updated, the banner to the Seventh Fleet site was updated (to reflect the updated URL), and removed The Bitter Villager from the blogs, since that site is no longer maintained. Not sure what happended with it. The blogs page is getting a little small, but there are are few more I think I will be adding. 

I downloaded the latest Visual C++ Express beta, and have been playing with it. I also installed PHP, Apache, and MySQL. PHP is pretty fun, and a little easier to use than Perl. I might convert some of the stuff on this site from Perl to PHP. One page is already done in PHP. Apache is hooked up with PHP, so I can play around with stuff on my machine without uploading it to the world at large. I am also trying to move the Star Trek info from Access to MySQL. It should be easy, once I am a little more familiar with MySQL. TOAD, a program I have been using with Oracle at work for many years, is available in beta for MySQL. Quest Software, the maker, is looking to go commercial with it soon. I have the printer networked again, except to the laptop. For some reason Win98 insists the drivers are not found despite the fact I installed them. The machine does not have enough memory to run XP, and I don't want to add more. 

The 20 Gig drive in the old computer fizzled last week. Not much of a loss since it contained games and stuff mirrored from the other drive. I'd like to get a USB drive now. The two drives were mashed one on top of the other, which does not leave much for airflow to take the heat away. I did lose the Age of Empire mods and games I had, but I can get those again. I realized I still had not even loaded Rome: Total War after buying it six months ago. I just don't have the time to sit down and play a computer game. One of the neighborhood kids was in playing yesterday, and was VERY fascinated with Starfleet Command III. I let him borrow it for a while. 

The uprights for the stairs on the deck are done. Just a few pieces of lattice, and the outside to do, and it's done. 

Rachel has been taking tennis lessons all this week. She has to get up and out to them by 8 AM, but they are right here in Layton, so it's not a big deal. She really likes it.

Patrick is still obsessed with the Pokemon Gameboy game. It's to the point where he wanders around outside with it. 

It's going to be a busy weekend. A friend's mother passed away suddenly, so we are watching her kids while she goes to Florida. 

End of Entry

Wood chips in the back yard

Stardate 58060.5 (6-5-2005)

Long time between log entries again. Its been a busy time. This may end up as a very long entry. The last few peices came in for the deck railing, and I finally put it up. I have to admit, it looks good. There was some confusion because the company did not order the correct stuff, but they got it straight with little fuss. I also put up the lattice underneath, so all that is left to do is some of the side and under the top stair. I'd like to get some solar lights that sit on top of the posts, but I need to decide which posts they need to go on.

We also weeded out the back slope last week, and had 13 cubic yards of wood chips delivered to our house. Because of the fence, I had them dump it in the driveway. I borrowed a wheelbarrow and started Saturday. I recruited Patrick, who has been obsessed with a Pokemon gameboy game by telling him he could have five minutes for every wheelbarrow. The other two kids wanted to help, so I offered money. The word spread across the neighborhood quickly. I soon had about seven kids. Within the hour, it dwindled to one. He worked the entire day. I had to have him stop before he dropped. I myself got dizzy late in the afternoon, which is a symptom of heat exhaustion. I took a break until the evening. A little after nine it was all moved. It was a little more than we needed, so I gave some of it to the neighbors. 

I have also been busy with the Mountain-Con website. It was running on Ray Graham's Xmission account. I saved all the information, and then tried to get it into a usable format. I struggled too get the frames working. I found out that FrontPage wanted to be smart and insert framesets all over the place. I eventually went to Notepad to get it to work. 

I have been on WeightWatchers for the last month and a half. I've lost about 12 pounds. The web site is pretty good, you can keep track of what eat online, and there is a lot of information. I like the program because you can eat whatever you want. It controls the amounts, and encourages more good food. I'd like to get to a more healthly lifestyle. The thing I did find amusing is that last week, at the weekly weigh-in, it warned me that I was losing weight too fast. It told me I needed to eat more, or lighten up on my activity. Be more lazy and don't go hungry, that's not bad.

I took my boys to see Revenge of the Sith. They loved it, I thought it was good, but not a memorable movie. I had already read the book, so I knew what was to happen. Ian McGregor and Ian McDermid did an excellent job, Hayden did alright, but I was disgusted with Natalie Portman's character. The first two have her independant, capable, and smart. This one she is weepy, whining backdrop. The effects were awesome, of course. 

I also saw Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. I liked the romance story. It did not take over the film, and gave Aurthor more a a reason to move. The film was badly paced. The book was introduced without any preamble, and there was no explanation as to why towels were important. Some of the funniest dialog from the book was not in the movie. It was still good, but it could have been better.

Today we went to see Kicking and Screaming, using some passes that April won. The movie was not very funny, and pretty much the same as every other movie about losers becoming winners. I would not recommend seeing it.

My dad is free from restrictions, and can leave his home. He is happy about it, but a little grumpy about needing the walker. But he is more independant now.

End of Entry